When life changes, it doesn’t always ask permission.
Sometimes it just stops — a marriage ends, a career dissolves, a child leaves home — and you’re left standing in shock or confusion, wondering what comes next.
After my divorce and a layoff, I reached that point. Both of my children were still living with me, my youngest freshly graduated from high school. She was planning a gap year. And me? I was trying to figure out what to do with the rest of mine.
I knew I couldn’t afford to stay where I was and needed to find a place to live with a lower cost of living and higher wages. So I did a google search — “cheap places to live”. What I had in mind was finding cheap cities in the US.
But that simple search gave me a whole new world to explore — literally! The results I got were not cities in the US but cheap countries to live in.
I had wanted to live in another country since I was 16. But I had forgotten about that dream — it seemed so out of reach — until now. The rest is history.
I began researching different countries to live in. I was leaning toward Latin America because I loved Mexico and wanted to explore Latin cultures in central or South America.
But my daughter had another idea. “What about Thailand?” she said one afternoon. Since she was coming with me for her gap year, I was willing to consider her opinions.
Asia hadn’t been on my radar. Too far, too foreign, too different from everything I knew. But the more I read, the more I felt drawn too Thailand.
Why not? I could get my TEFL training there and easily get a job in a school teaching English as a second language. If I didn’t like it, I could always venture on to another country with my certification in hand.
So we went to Thailand. And I’m so grateful she suggested it, because Thailand turned out to be one of my favorite countries.
Almost ten years later, I’m writing this from Paraguay — proof that one decision can change more than your address. It can change your life’s direction entirely.
When Life Forces You to Start Over
No matter how it begins — through divorce, a layoff, or an empty nest — starting over can feel simultaneously terrifying, exciting, confusing. Sort of like standing in the middle of someone else’s life.
Once the shock settles, more questions arise. Not just what comes next, but where life might actually work better now.
The routines that once gave shape to your days suddenly feel empty. The future you planned don’t make sense anymore.
After Divorce: Reclaiming Your Sense of Self
Divorce can take away more than a partner. It takes the identity that came with the relationship — wife, teammate, half of the “we”. Moving abroad gives you something new to belong to: yourself. It’s a chance to rediscover who you are when no one else is defining you.
After a Layoff: When Security Disappears Overnight
A layoff can shake your confidence in every direction. Even when you saw it coming, it leaves you wondering, “Who am I without my career?”.
But what if it’s not an ending — it could be a reset.
A lower cost of living abroad can buy time to breathe, to explore other ways to earn, or to simply live more freely than you could before.
After the Empty Nest: Rediscovering Purpose Beyond Family
When the last child leaves, the silence can be deafening. For years, your purpose was all about caring for others. Now, it’s time to care for yourself. So many women find that moving abroad rekindles curiosity, energy, and purpose they’d forgotten.
If you’re standing at a similar crossroads — after a divorce, a layoff, or an empty nest — and wondering whether life abroad might actually fit you, my free guide Is Moving Abroad Right for You? walks you through the first questions to ask yourself. It’s a gentle way to explore what you want next — and whether a move abroad could be part of your encore.
Why Moving Abroad Speaks to So Many Women Over 55
More women over 55 are moving abroad than ever. The reasons are different for everyone, but they often share one thing: wanting more freedom and less pressure.
According to the InterNations Expat Insider Report on women abroad, about one in four female expats (24%) were over the age of 50, and women now make up nearly half of the global expat population overall. While detailed statistics are limited, these numbers reflect a clear trend: more women in midlife are exploring life beyond their home country — on their own terms.
Lower Cost, Higher Quality of Life
Many countries offer affordable healthcare, fresh food, and comfortable homes for a fraction of what life costs in the U.S. It’s not just about saving money — it’s about removing the constant financial stress.
Adventure Without Apology
After years of putting others first, it can feel thrilling to put yourself at the center of the story. Living abroad brings new foods, languages, friends, and perspectives — and each one changes how you see yourself.
Space to Be
When you simplify your surroundings, you make space for peace. You begin to see what actually matters — and realize how little you really need.
You’re not too old. You’re not being reckless. You’re being resourceful.
The Mindset That Makes All the Difference
Before you pack a single box, the first move is internal. You have to give yourself permission to want something different.
Thailand wasn’t the destination I initially expected. But it’s where I met a retired woman who changed my perspective entirely. She was living alone, safely, happily — and she eased my fears when I told her I was nervous.
“It’s safer here than back home,” she said. “You’ll see.”
And she was right. That conversation was when I realized I wasn’t running away from something. I was moving toward something that was calling me — even if I couldn’t see the full picture yet.
If you’re standing at that same threshold, try asking yourself:
- What am I ready to leave behind?
- What do I most want to feel in my next chapter?
- What would a good day look like in my new life?
You don’t need all the answers — just curiosity and courage.
How to Begin When You Don’t Know Where to Begin
It’s okay not to have a plan. Most of us start with curiosity and a few brave Google searches. But if you’re wondering where to start, here’s what helps:
- Start with curiosity. Watch YouTube videos, read blogs, and follow women who’ve done what you’re dreaming about.
- Join expat Facebook groups. Read, listen, and learn from day-to-day questions people ask.
- Make a “Dream or Dealbreaker” list. What must a place have? What can you live without?
- Give yourself 90 days. Working within a defined planning window to research visas, healthcare, housing, and lifestyle keeps the idea from staying hypothetical.
Almost Ten Years Later
My daughter’s gap year eventually ended, but by then, I’d realized mine had just begun.
Since Thailand, I’ve lived in Ecuador, Peru, Vietnam, Bulgaria, Albania, Mexico, and now Paraguay — each place has taught me something about what it means to begin again.
The first moves were messy. The learning curves were steep. But each chapter peeled away another layer of fear and replaced it with freedom.
Moving abroad didn’t just give me new scenery. It gave me a new sense of self.
I wasn’t running from my old life. I was walking toward a new one. And every step has been worth it. Even the missteps. Especially the missteps. Because those are the stories I tell now, the ones that remind me I’m still growing, still learning, still becoming.
And isn’t that what an encore is all about?
